Facebook friend stereotypes

I like Facebook (to a certain extent). I like being on Facebook, for professional (yes, I get paid to be on Facebook. Sue me?!) and personal reasons.

What I do on (my personal) Facebook consist of posting photos, sharing articles I find interesting/photos I find inspirational or amusing, occasionally posting statuses and liking people’s statuses, and I also comment on people’s statutes and photos. I like to think I do them moderately…. I think I do. I don’t play Facebook games (I used to, but I quit a few years ago) and I never bother with Facebook game invites from my Facebook friends.

I notice that there are these stereotypes of Facebook friends, at least those in my timeline.

1. The uber-positive

Their statuses are a series of inspirational quotes (from famous people or ones they make up themselves) and they post smartly-captioned photos or Instagrammy quotes. On any given day, this can provide me with a mood booster or a few moments of self-introspection, but do that every single day and I get a bit annoyed because they come off as trying to show the world (or me) how mature and wise and positive they are.

2. The lovey-dovey

You love him. He loves you. You really love each other. Yes, we get it. Thank you. Now go text or chat on BlackBerry Messenger or Whatsapp or call, for Batman’s sake.

3. The boaster

Oh, so she went shopping in Hong Kong last weekend? But hadn’t she just got back from Paris last month? Not to mention the club-hopping and dinners and brunches at those overpriced and over-hyped cafes/bistros in Jakarta. And she still manages to be stick-thin, with perfect hair and make up, and is that yet another pair of new shoes? *grumble* Maybe I’m just jealous, but maybe, just maybe, they also have IDR 20 million in credit card debt, or they are bulimic, or they are just posers because if life is that good, why do they spend so much time on Facebook? Maybe.

4. The complainer

The opposite of #1. The archenemy of the uber-positive, if only an uber-positive is capable of seeing another human being as their enemy, because, no, their inner-peace won’t let them. The complainer complain about every single thing. The weather, the traffic, the waiter at the restaurant they are currently having dinner at, the barista who spelled their names wrong, the government for the fuel price hike, the uneducated people who go to shopping malls and not to gallery openings or museums on weekends, in short…. everything.

5. The sales

They sell stuff and they offer you they stuff they are buying, directly and indirectly. The sales can also be the recruiters, those who are active in multi-level-marketing and every day (even more than once a day) post statuses about their achievements and how they are encouraging their so-called-downlines to be confident and get those x percent commission/trip to Bali/new car, etc etc.

6. The parents

They have their kids’ photos as their profile picture. They post endless photos of their kids in (identical) poses only with different clothes/hair accessories/toys/angle of drool hanging from their cute tiny mouths. Their statuses can be combined into a baby journal, detailing their kids’ first word/step/vomit/bite of stuffed animal; and it can also be made into a bragging book of how they are excellent parents because they breast-feed/quit their jobs to take care of their precious jewels/buy thousands of dollars McLaren or Quinny strollers/dress their kids in Baby Gap/cook their kids meals and everything is organic.

I have my fair share of being a little bit of every stereotypes  I listed above (except #5 and #6), but you know, I really -really- try to do them moderately and I don’t think I lean too much into any of these categories. Let me know if you think I’m starting to turn into one stereotype 🙂

-ciciA

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